Daily Advice: August 26th, 2009

Dealing with women is like playing Nintendo Punch-out.

You have to work your way up the ladder.

You have to beat GlassJaw Murphy and all his friends before you get to face Mike Tyson.

Daily Note: August, 25th, 2009

If you are single, and looking for a date, don't ask girls out. Tell them they are going to go out with you.

Daily Advice: August 24th, 2009

If you want the freshest bread, grab from the middle of the bag.

Daily note: August 22, 2009

What's your licorice sort?

Most people prefer red licorice to black licorice at first. Some choose never to try the black again after one taste, claiming they prefer the red option much more. Others give the black a few more tastes, mainly out of intrigue and mystique, only to realize it's one of the best tastes on their palet .

bagels always start a fight... the pronounciation is always up for debate for some reason... but no one ever provides a competitor to Bagel


Sometimes I feel like the stop sign near my house with the branch in front of it. I'm here, I'm trying to be seen, but everyone is just speeding right past me.

Contract negotiations

Whenever dealing with contracts it is to be expected the first offer will be a total low ball.

Don't be insulted by it.

Always ask for a little bit more.

You deserve it, and it will make them think you're serious.

Convience Charge

Int. Jug and Milk store

Conor enters, smiles at the attendant, and b lines it to the back of the store. He grabs a four pack of cashmere toilet paper and brings it to the cash. The Cashier is Korean...let's call him sly.

Conor: Just this.

Sly: 10 dollar.

Conor: for this?! At the Metro down the street it's 8 bucks for 10!

Sly posts up...........

Sly: The Metro....where is that?

Conor: The Metro...it's right down there, 1 mile, in Liberty Village. You know the---

Sly: ahhhh....yes...why you not just walk there?

Conor: It's, I, it's kind of far. I only need this right now.

Sly: So it's out of the way.

Conor: It's just, for one thing, it's--

Sly: Not convenient.

Conor sees where he's going with this.

Conor: I guess, but--

Sly: It's a convenience store. Everything in here more convenient. The gum, convenient. The pizza pops more convenient. The drinks, the magazines, the cigarette so convenient. 2 dollar convenience charge.

Conor: Yeah, yeah..okay.

Conor pays for his toilet paper.

Sly: Enjoy your Cashmere. It's soft...and more convenient.

Conor exits.